Love Is the Only True Emotion, and Fear Is Its Counterfeit

 In a conversation a few days ago, I said something about: in the world of metaphysical thinking, it’s postulated that there is only one true emotion. That emotion is love. Everything else is a derivative of fear. The friend to whom I was speaking said, “Would you do a podcast about that?”

In this episode, we explore a few definitions of love, including Eros, Philia, and Agape.

We also talk about fear, love's great counterfeit, and how to recognize and replace it with love. The happiest people live there.

You'll find the article, 3 Signs of Fear Addiction, at  https://libertycounsellingluxembourg.com/3-signs-of-fear-addiction/

To get hold of me and talk about how I can best help you, go to https://natewalkercoaching.com/contact-1 and share your thoughts, notes, comments, or aspirations in the comments section. Or, DM me on Facebook, etc.  Tell me how I can help you best, and we'll schedule some time together, free of charge, to discuss it. 
 
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Transcript

Podcast 55: Love Is the Only True Emotion, and Fear Is Its Counterfeit

Hello my friends. In a conversation a few days ago, I said something about: in the world of metaphysical thinking, it’s postulated that there is only one true emotion. That emotion is love. Everything else is a derivative of fear. The friend to whom I was speaking said, “would you do a podcast about that?” 

So Bill, this is yours—and everybody else’s.  

Elizabeth Kubler Ros, a Swiss psychiatrist, said, “There are only two emotions, love and fear. All positive emotions come from love. All negative emotions, from fear. From love flows, happiness, contentment, peace and joy. From fear comes anger, hate, anxiety, and guilt. It’s true that there are only two primary emotions, love and fear. But it’s more accurate to say that there is only love or fear for, we cannot feel these two emotions together at exactly the same time. They’re opposites. If we are in fear, we are not in a place of love. When we’re in a place of love, we cannot be in a place of fear.” 

Now, there are several different ways to define love, of course. The Greeks had at least eight words or eight types of love that they described. The ones that we’re going to talk about for a moment are three of those.  

The first: Eros, romantic love. That’s where the word erotic comes from. Eros is that first kind of love, named after the Greek God of fertility, and in real life, this translates to romance, passion, desire, attraction—all of that kind of stuff can be very intoxicating. That’s one kind of love.  

Philia is the kind of love that could be best described as deep, long-lasting friendship, or brotherly love. That’s where the name for the city Philadelphia comes from. It’s platonic, respectful, and involves deep caring about the other person. 

Agape is universal love. Selfless, unconditional charity. The purest type of love there is. In the Bible, in Corinthians 13, verse two, we read, “ and though I have the gift of prophecy and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. 

Love is something that we can spend a lifetime developing. A lifetime cultivating. Love is the richest thing that we can do in life.  

Now, there’s one kind that we haven’t mentioned and that the Greeks didn’t really have a name for, but we take this from the historical record known as The Princess Bride, and that is Wuv, Twu Wuv, which as we all know is the greatest thing in the world. 

As with the others, it’s something that we develop over time. Love takes practice, but so does its counterfeit. Unfortunately, there are those who gain great power, great influence, and great wealth by cultivating fear in all of us.  

Fear is not your friend. It really is the polar opposite of love.  

Now, reasonable fear makes sense. . If I’m being chased by a rabid dog, I’m gonna run. But that fear is something that lasts only for a short time, not for the rest of my life.  

Fear that becomes a part of us, a part of our identity, or too much a part of our day-to-day existence, is a huge issue. Edmund Burke, put it this way: “No passion so effectively robs the mind of its powers of acting and reasoning as fear.” 

If your fear is about the nonexistent, Your fear is 100% imaginary. The Indian Yogi Sadhguru says, “Fear is not a product of life. Fear is a product of a hallucinatory mind. You suffer that which does not exist because you are rooted not in reality, but in your mind, which is constantly eating up on the past and excreting into the future. 

“You don’t actually know anything about the future. You just take a piece of the past, apply makeup on it, and think it’s the future.” 

How’s that for a powerful quote?  

Most of our fear really is based on what we think might happen. It’s a waste of time and energy.  

The word anxiety is often used in relation to fear. Anxiety is a condition resulting from constant, long-term fear; from worry or concern about things that may or may not happen. That’s not helping you.  

When I work with NLP clients, I am sure to tell them, “All anxiety comes from a focus on what we do not want.” That long-term fear will destroy your mind and your body.  

It’s possible for fear to become an addiction. So much so, that I think we see a society addicted to fear. Look at how that addiction is fed. Do you have friends and loved ones who have the TV running all day long, who listen to one news channel or to several? Have you noticed that it foments fear and increases anxiety, as time and time again, we’re told what is wrong with the world and not what is right? Are we doing our part, in that case, to seek that that is virtuous, lovely, of good report, or praiseworthy? I don’t think so.  

Are you curious to know if you might be addicted to fear? If you have built up a personal narrative around fear, you may be. For those who have an addiction to fear, their personal history is construed by adverse events, so much so in fact, that they allow themselves to be entirely defined by their negative life experiences. Does that sound like you? I’ll include a link to an article about this possibility of Fear Addiction in the podcast Notes. 

A Second sign of fear addiction is: your lifestyle choices reinforce your fear. Any type of addiction is high maintenance by default. Fear addicts keep themselves in a fear state by creating and maintaining habits that reinforce their addiction, just as I mentioned a few minutes ago about how we consume the news. I should put “the news” in air quotes.  

Number three: you gravitate toward people who reinforce your fear. Positive, emotionally mature, zen and centered people, are uninteresting for the fear driven unless they feel consciously overwhelmed by their own addiction, they choose to be surrounded by individuals who add to their drama and reinforce their fear. 

So what do you do if fear occupies your mind a greater percentage of the time than love? What do you do if you have a hard time feeling love for yourself? What do you do if you have a hard time thinking about the future without fear?  

 The following things may be helpful to you. The first of these is something that I recommend to all, no matter what, and that is, identify your fears. Be very specific about what they are, and then question them. Identify what percentage of the things that you have written down, that you’re afraid of, are something that’s only a future possibility, not an inevitable disaster, and act accordingly. 

I also recommend that you avoid alcohol, or anything that causes a change in the way you think, that may be detrimental.  

 Faith and spirituality can be very helpful, as can talking therapies; maybe seeing a counselor.  

Medication may be helpful, though I recommend you seek those things that are only short term, except in extreme circumstances.  

Support groups may be helpful.  

Complimentary therapies may be helpful. Incidentally, that’s what I do. I’m a certified complimentary medicine provider, specializing in NLP and in changing patterns of thought. 

Now all of us experience fear. Hopefully all of us experience love. In a letter to my son several years ago, I said, As I struggle with the difficulties that attend this mortal education—pain and fatigue, sin and regret, discouragement and doubt, fear and folly, I am humbly grateful for the long-suffering of God, whose brilliant light pierces the darkness to illuminate my heart, to fill me with gratitude, and to remind me that he is in charge.” 

Quoting again from Elizabeth Kubler Ros, “The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep, loving concern.” 

“Beautiful people do not just happen. Should you shield the canyons from the windstorms, you would never see the true beauty of their carvings.” 

When you are afraid, face it head on. Fear need not be permanent. Replace fear with good things that are permanent. Do so by following the instruction given by Jesus in the Parable of the Good Samaritan, which we talked about in our last episode. Love God. Love your neighbor, love yourself. In doing so, you’ll be much more successful in following one of the most plentiful admonitions given by God himself: “Fear not.” 

Look around this week for opportunities to show love in any way, to any creature. But especially, look for ways to show love to yourself. Real love. Deep, abiding, fearless love; the only true emotion.  

We’ll talk again soon.